{"id":15,"date":"2011-02-02T04:05:51","date_gmt":"2011-02-02T04:05:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/2011\/02\/02\/the-currently-untitled-fairy-tale-story-2\/"},"modified":"2011-02-02T04:05:51","modified_gmt":"2011-02-02T04:05:51","slug":"the-currently-untitled-fairy-tale-story-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/2011\/02\/02\/the-currently-untitled-fairy-tale-story-2\/","title":{"rendered":"The Currently Untitled Fairy Tale Story 2"},"content":{"rendered":"

Taffeta, One.<\/strong><\/p>\n

In looking back, Taffeta could only describe her life as being singularly uninteresting. Because of her kingdom\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s relative isolation her bevy of handmaidens were all from the surrounding countryside and woefully unqualified to discuss anything of any interest, her wardrobe was filled to the brim with silks in colours and cuts that were in fashion at least three seasons ago, and by the time gossip reached her, it had long since been resolved and wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t even the least bit scandalous any longer.<\/p>\n

She had, in fact, spent the last fifteen years in tragic boredom. Who, she wondered, would want to sit through tiresome assemblies about the state of the kingdom, and this peasant\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s dispute, and that local warlord\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s latest conquest? Who, she demanded, would think this position a privilege?<\/p>\n

Well, certainly not her.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Blah, blah, blah\u00e2\u20ac\u009d the Minister of Expertly Dyed and Woven Goods droned on, so that all Taffeta could occupy herself with was the remarkably large mole on his chin and wondering how, exactly, he convinced his wife to kiss him. <\/p>\n

It couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t be because of his station; certainly, he was more important than the Minister of Crudely Dyed and Woven Goods, and definitely more important than the Minister of Quite Nicely Woven, But Not Very Well Dyed Goods, but he was hardly very important in the grand scheme of things. There were at least 37 more important ministers that Taffeta could think of off the top of her head, so she couldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t imagine that his wife would kiss him because she thought it would be politically beneficial.<\/p>\n

Perhaps she had <\/em>to! Perhaps she was being forced!<\/em> Now that would be perfectly dreadful. For one thing, she would have to tilt her head at a most improbable angle to avoid that horrible mole, and that was likely to lead to all sorts of neck problems.<\/p>\n

She had been pondering this for quite some time when she realized that everyone in the court was staring at her, and that they were all sideways, so Taffeta quickly righted her head and smiled prettily at her mother.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Taffeta, darling, do you need another servant for your hair?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Her mother gave her a sympathetic smile, her hand held at the ready to call for another servant immediately.<\/p>\n

Taffeta\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s expression immediately flattened like a fallen souffl\u00c3\u00a9. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153No, mother,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she clarified, casting a glare back at her Chief Hair Carrier. He was always yanking on her hair and she had decided very early on that one such bumbling oaf was more than enough.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Are you sure, darling? It has grown quite a bit in the last few months\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Her mother continued to smile tentatively at her, which only served to perturb Taffeta further.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m fine,<\/em> mother. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s not even half as long as yours and you only have one Hair Carrier.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

Her mother glanced nervously at the large, superbly muscled attendant currently holding thirty-feet of her long blond hair on an ornate pillow.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, darling,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she admitted, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153but Rotherick is quite a bit bigger than Chester.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She smiled apologetically at Chester, who only blushed furiously and very nearly dumped Taffeta\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s golden tresses on the ground as he tried to bow to the Queen.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well how is Chester to get any bigger if he doesn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t get practice holding my hair?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Taffeta was becoming more and more exasperated by the minute. The only thing more tedious than sitting through court was her mother interrupting<\/em> court to coddle her. She was fifteen<\/em> for heaven\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s sake! She\u00e2\u20ac\u2122d be married off to some prince or especially well-off baron soon, and her mother wasn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t going to change that by treating her like a child. She only hoped her husband wouldn\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t have an unforgivably hideous mole like the minister. Or a weak chin like Chester.<\/p>\n

Her mother only hesitated a moment. \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Alright.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d <\/p>\n

She was still staring at Taffeta. <\/p>\n

And so was everyone else. <\/p>\n

Which meant they expected something from her.<\/p>\n

But what?<\/p>\n

She was beginning to feel perturbed all over again when the minister cleared his throat. How could she possibly be expected to know what it was he wanted? Inwardly, she grumbled about the presumption of the lower classes.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153What do you think?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d her mother prompted carefully, giving her eldest daughter an encouraging look.<\/p>\n

Taffeta pulled herself up to her full height, and brushed a stray lock of hair away.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Well,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she began imperiously, trying to remember what they had been talking about.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Of course,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she began again, trying to stop thinking about the minister\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s hideous mole. <\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Of course,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d she said, and at last decided to finish with: \u00e2\u20ac\u0153I completely disagree.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d She usually disagreed, so that seemed safe.<\/p>\n

That was, of course, until the entire court seemed to gasp as one.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153You disagree, darling?\u00e2\u20ac\u009d Her mother sounded very concerned now, and Taffeta could only quash her own growing worry with more irritation.<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Yes, of course I disagree!\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Then,\u00e2\u20ac\u009d her mother began shakily, and Taffeta became very worried when her mother blinked back a tear, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Taffeta will indeed marry the minister\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s son. May it be a joyous day for all.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n

That was the last thing Taffeta heard before she very abruptly fainted dead away.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Taffeta, One. In looking back, Taffeta could only describe her life as being singularly uninteresting. Because of her kingdom\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s relative isolation her bevy of handmaidens were all from the surrounding countryside and woefully unqualified to discuss anything of any interest, her wardrobe was filled to the brim with silks in colours and cuts that were […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fantasy","category-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.silly-sara.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}